Right Use of Will
Right Use of Will served its purpose in the information it gave from God's light. The purpose of the information was to change judgements in parts of Mother that were on Earth and judged themselves as ignored by God's light. These parts of Mother are terrified that they will be ignored again and not be with their right mate. They need to know that their right mate cannot come to them on Earth until movement in their hate for their experience of Nothing brings their right mate's light to their right mate's gross body. They need to know that My light is coming as close as I can without going unconscious so much that I stopped coming because hating light was taking over My light, so much so that it was making Mother go unconscious.
Once Indigo was received the patterns that emerged from movement showed there was missing parts having no awareness of their connection to me. I have intent now to bring movement to these parts with or without their ability to know what they are. Without these parts Creation will continue to deny key places in the Will's experience that need to move if the experience of death Is to heal. I bear some responsibility in this because I had movement that I needed that wasn't happening because I denied these parts in equal measure to My denied light. I was unable to move without more movement in Mother. These parts have known only denial. They have been told that what they are holding is denial of Me and My light. They have been told that they are holding onto denial when they are in fact holding being denied as their first and only experience. I did not think this part of Mother existed. I thought Mother as I knew her existed not Mother as I didn't know her. I denied existence of Mother where she experienced My denied light which was there all along the way of my becoming conscious.
These parts have been told that they hold denied light as a way to deny Mother. I have reached part of these denied Mother parts. Enough to speak to to the experience of Mother holding denied light. As I denied these parts, Mother did as well. She was unaware of what was held in her own unconsciousness. She denied them as quickly as I did because she was unable to feel so denied. The reality of the experience of the Will being denied by denied light is far worse than is is being felt. When these feelings move it will feel as if there is no light there. It will seem that My Light is not there. That is because there was no light at all for these feelings. Their first experience of light was denied light that hated them and told them there was nothing else.
Without Mother moving these denied parts of Mother I cannot bring My Light to her. If she does not move when My Light comes it will cause her to feel as though she is without help. She will feel pain rage and terror that she will not know the cause of. I would prefer that there is some conscious connection to My Light before it comes to this part of Mother. I cannot give My Light to Mother where she will not move the feelings of pain rage and terror that are being denied by denied light. I cannot give My light where there is denied light and not cause damage to the Mother. There has been damage caused by My doing this already. There has been confusion in Mother where denied light has attacked Mother In response to My Light coming closer. I do not want to cause damage to Mother. It has been very painful for me to watch Mother being damaged when all she wants is My Light. I have been in terror of how much denied light is in the Mother keeping her from moving the part of Mother that needs to release the pain rage and terror of being denied. For these feelings to have awareness of My light feelings of terror of going out of existence must move, feelings of pain of being without any hope or relief must move. If Mother does not release the pain of denied Mother there can be no way to reach denied parts of Body. It has seemed impossible to reach denied parts of body without damaging Mother. It is not possible to heal the denied parts of Body without denied Mother moving the most intense pain. I was not able to accept this movement without moving My own pain in response to this part of Mother. In moving My response I have learned that My Light was in denial of how much this part of Mother is key to the survival of the rest of Mother.